Sustaining the Harder Right Requires Reflection

I opened Leading With A Clear Purpose with a story detailing the conversation I had with a lifelong friend who shared how one of his businesses no longer provided him with fulfillment while his other, albeit much more physically demanding, kept his heart full all the time. The business that was filling his need for purpose was a small (at the time) mixed martial arts gym where he held classes for all age groups. In follow up to that initial discussion, he shared how some of his students get discouraged when they don’t feel like they’re progressing as quickly as they had hoped. Since he’s the owner and lead coach for everyone there, I challenged him to look for ways he could help them see just how much they’ve improved, be that routinely in one-on-one conversations or by recognizing specific achievements as they happen. The reality each of his students face is that it’s an incredibly challenging process. Since everyone they’re training with is also getting better, it can be tough for any of us to see our own improvement. And that can quickly become demoralizing, especially for the new guy who rarely comes out on top when going head-to-head.

As important as it is for my friend to be able to highlight the progress each of his students have made, we all share a similar need; members of a team as well as leaders of that team. The work we’ll need to do to rally a community around our organization’s core values will seem futile at times. As I’ve already suggested a few times, we’ll frequently be faced with the option of moving toward the easier wrong instead of staying the course of the harder right that models our values. When we’re under constant pressure to achieve bottom line results, sticking to our values over the long haul can seem like not gaining any ground at all.

For those of us who have accepted the responsibility of leadership, especially when we’re fast-paced and task-oriented with measurable results serving as a primary driving force, slowing down enough to reflect on how much we’ve actually accomplished rarely happens. Most leaders I’ve known over the years have a tendency to keep their heads down and push through anything and everything that’s thrown at them. That constant focus on getting things done doesn’t typically allow for much of a look back at where they’ve come from. Make no mistake, I’m not throwing stones at anyone who’s guilty of this! Without Cindy building times into our schedule for this type of reflection, I don’t think I’d ever do it on my own. And I doubt I could have kept focused on our clear purpose without her doing this…

In 2012/2013, just as we were finally getting our heads above water financially after a near-foreclosure thanks to a fiasco with Wells Fargo, we found ourselves in a scenario where we had no choice but to address a situation with some business associates that went against our values. We took a stand, but that stand came with substantial financial consequences (to the tune of six figures in lost revenue annually since). As tough as that was at the time, on our bank account and because we quickly learned that some of the folks we had considered as close friends were nothing of the sort, we’ve never regretted that decision. In the ten-plus years since, we’ve had several more occasions that have forced us to make similar decisions. Each time, we’ve chosen to stick with the values we hold most dear. And each time, it’s definitely been harder - financially and physically, and often even emotionally.

At any point along the way, it would have been very easy to look at where we were right then and thrown in the proverbial towel. We’ve always had a busy schedule, but that’s grown exponentially with all that’s involved in starting and running our business. Without Cindy being so intentional about us dedicating time to reflect on our overall progress as well as the successes we’ve had along the way, sustaining those values - and the work we’ve done to build our business - may not have happened. Without that, we wouldn’t have had a solid foundation to rally a community around or to ever have a shot at being viewed as an overnight success - and we’ll pick up there next time!